Sim-O

From xkcd…

I like the title text too…

Dear Editor of Homeopathy Monthly:
I have two small corrections to your July issue. One, it’s spelled “echinacea”, and two, homeopathic medecines are no better than placebos and your entire magazine is a sham.

The Daily Mail reports that…

Fathers who are involved during pregnancy could help reduce the risk of infant mortality during their child’s first year of life, a new study says

First the obvious. As always with this kind of reporting and/or study, how does the baby know that the father is involved and not an imposter pretending to be the father? Does it reduce the risk of infant mortality if it is an imposter?

What level of involvement would bring about this reduction in risk of infant mortality?

Father involvement was defined by the presence of the father’s name on the infant’s birth certificate. While this measure does not assess how much the father was around during pregnancy, other studies have established that a father named on the record was likely to have been involved to some extent before the birth.

Huh? A scribble of ink on a piece of paper is all that is needed? Oh if only it was that easy.

So this study just looked to see if there was a name on a birth certificate and because other studies found that this meant the father was ‘likely’ to be involved, came to the conclusion that a fathers involvement in pregnancy reduces the risk of infant mortality. Hmm. Highly scientific, then.

Dr Alio said paternal support could decrease the mother’s emotional stress, which has been linked to poor pregnancy outcomes.
Fathers-to-be could also encourage mothers to live a more healthy lifestyle. The study found women with absent partners were more likely to smoke during pregnancy and get inadequate prenatal care.

It’s fathers that help remember. Not partners, same sex or otherwise, or having a big bank account, or which country or area of a country that helps. Fathers do. Woo hoo! Aren’t fathers special, eh?

Junk science from a junk paper.

What’s with this ad?

Lets celebrate everything that human race have acheived. The extra-ordinary world that we have created that is so far from the trees and caves from whence we came.

You can do that at 8.30pm 27th March with the Human Achievement Hour.

During Human Achievement Hour, people around the world will be recognising the incredible accomplishments of the human race.

Originally conceived by the Competitive Enterprise Institute in 2009, Human Achievement Hour coincides with the earth hour campaign but salutes those who keep the lights on and produce the energy that makes human achievement possible.

Damn. It coincides with Earth Hour. I’m sure there’s a good reason the exact same hour was chosen. Gotta choose which to do then. Decisions, decisions. They’re both important things, really aren’t they? We got to look after the planet. Whether man made climate change is real or not, we don’t don’t want to mess our home up. You wouldn’t shit on your living room carpet, would you? Would you?

On the other hand, look what humans have acheived. flight, wireless communications, men walking on the moon. We truly are an incredible animal. That surely deserves our support.

I’m gonna go with the Human achievement hour. Let’s celebrate people for a change. We are down on ourselves a lot recently, a big pat on the back would do us good. What have I gotta do to praise the demi-god (and compared to mere animals, we are gods) that is the human?

Millions of people around the world will be showing their support for human achievement by simply going about their daily lives. While earth hour activists will be left in the dark, Human Achievement Hour participants will be going to the cinema, enjoying a hot meal, driving their car or watching television.

What? But I simply ‘go about my daily life’ er, daily. Does that mean that even if I didn’t know about this hour I would still be celebrating it?
Surely then, I celebrate with a human achievement hour 8736 times a year?

This isn’t a celebration. It’s a…

Now, where’s my lentil meusli…?

Hand out mephedrone in nightclubs, says ex-drugs tsar Professor David Nutt

You what? Has the man taken leave of his senses? This stuff is dangerous. D.A.N.G.E.R.O.U.S.

But in a classic Daily Mail sidestep, that’s not quite what the Prof said. There’s more to it than just doleing out drugs.

I wouldn’t be against exploring the possibility of some sort of regulated use for MDMA or mephedrone where people, maybe in clubs, could have access to small amounts, safe amounts under guidance.

What Professor Nutt is saying is have a look at regulated access to the drugs. He isn’t even saying we should do that, just that we should look into what sort of harm reduction may be achieved from letting consenting adults, because only adults are allowed in nightclubs, buy untainted drugs that aren’t cut with all the usual rubbish along with the information to let those adults make an informed choice. We do that with alcohol and cigarettes, so why not with other substances that are no more harmful than alcohol and cigarettes?

The headline which gives the impression that every club should have someone just dishing out mindbending drugs to who ever wants them in what ever quantities are asked for. That is just ridiculous. We don’t even do that in pubs, and pubs are only there to sell you a mindbending drug.

This sort of mis-representation would be right at home at the Daily Mail. But it isn’t. It’s the Independent, a supposedly ‘quality’ paper. No wonder it’s had to pay someone to buy it. Which is bribery, isn’t it?

Look at this…

It’s a neoprene bracelet with a hologram on it. Remember that. It’s made from the same stuff as wetsuits and a little hologram. It’s not just for decoration, though. It is a nifty bit of magic.

I was told about it by a friend who said that surfers use them because they improve your balance. We laughed, naturally. I then googled it and am told that these things ‘promote balance, flexibility, strength and overall wellness’. The ‘subtle’ magic in these holograms is so subtle that they don’t even need to be worn, they can have an effect even when they are only near a person.

How does it work? Here comes the science bit…

Subtle frequencies (bio data) are programmed into holographic media. These frequencies resonate with the body’s red blood cells believed to amplify and increases the efficiency of electronic, chemical, and organic systems.

The human body is a bio-electrical system, “Bio-field”. The bio-electrical energy is created by cells in varying frequencies through muscular actions and can be altered, strengthened, and balanced when influenced by [the magic hologram].

[The magic hologram] can be understood by imagining how the tuning fork works resonating a specific vibration at a constant pitch. Similarly, [the magic hologram] resonates multiple frequencies “bio-data” with the body’s Bio-field, forcing the Bio-field into vibrational motion – at its natural frequency to enhance cell-to-cell communications.

Who believes this stuff? It’s just a load of horse-shit. I would go through that description, but it speaks for itself, doesn’t it?

Update (i really shouldn’t publish posts so readily, should I?):
Surfing magazine interviewed a salesman of these thing last May (my emphasis on the last question)…

SURFING: What the hell exactly is this thing?

HARRY: Power Balance is based on the reality of frequencies. Albert Einstein said that everything in life is vibrations. Power Balance, in effect, is it’s own frequency — just like a radio station is a frequency. The use of frequencies has been around for ages: from ancient metals to modern EKG’s. The guys who made Power Balance learned how to transfer this particular frequency onto a medium — this hologram — to make it possible for everyone to benefit from it. When you put Power Balance next to your body, it resonates with the frequency in your body — similar to how you tune a guitar with a tuning fork. So it helps you tune your body to that particular “pitch” and the energy in your body — or the Chi as they say in Chinese — is at an optimal level; increasing balance, concentration, flexibility, blood flow… Power Balance helps your body work to its maximum potential.

So, are you a witch?

I’m not, but I think the owners might have met a witch when they found this thing.

But really, is this thing magic? It doesn’t really seem to work very, you know, logically.

No, it’s science. Frequencies are used in MRI’s in hospitals, they use frequencies to cure tumors. Everything has its own frequencies — from an earthquake to this spoon — everything is resonating. It sounds weird and wonderful, but it’s a fact and it’s the basis of this whole universe that everything has its own frequency.

BBC…

The Church of England’s ruling body will close its meeting with a call for more recognition of the compatibility of religious belief with science.

The motion will urge it to fight back in what is the latest move in a public battle between atheists and believers.

The compatibility of science and religion only goes so far.
The scientist that is also a believer may, for instance, recognise evolution and all the current scientific thoeries as true and look deeper in to how the world works, but ultimately, will come to the conclusion that it all started with god.

An athiest scientist will keep looking.

The motion at the General Synod in London is proposed by Dr Peter Capon.

Many religious people feel they are being gradually pushed out of the public sphere by opponents who are using science as a weapon.

‘Science’ itself isn’t the weapon, rational arguement is. And seeing as religion is not a rational ‘thing’*, then religion is on a loser. Science will one day have all the answers. Although it may take a bit of time.

(*I can’t find the link to which religious person said it recently, so drop a link in the comments if you do)

Dr Capon, himself a former lecturer in computer science, says atheists are misleading the public when they claim science and religion are incompatible.

Athiests are misleading the public? Atheists are using evidence and rational thought. It is the religious folk that are misleading the public with stories and assertions and rules that have supposedly come form god but only come from someone or people with a knack for manipulating people and telling a good story.

Think of it this way. Two scientists, one an atheist and one a believer, after rigorous experimentation and testing and research, after following all the evidence they find about the beginning of life, the universe and everything, they end up ringing the doorbell on the Pearly Gates. God answers.
The religious scientist turns to the atheist and says ‘See. I said it was him that did it. Our quest for the ultimate answer has finished.’
The Atheist scientist looks at God and asks ‘So. How did you do it, then?’

Via Gimpy’s blog (this post about homeopaths launching a hate campaign again Dr Evan Harris MP), I ended up at the Homeopathy Heals site. I will admit that I don’t read homeopathic stuff much. Why bother? It’s a load of old wank. I read various skeptics, if that is the right word for these guys that believe medicine should be subjected to proper trials with replicable, provable results, because they’re a good read with various levels of shock/outrage/’wtf-ness’/humour.

I’m not sure why though, but I though I would have a look at this Homeopathy Heals site. There’s nothing here that will surprise you, but anyway here is my tuppence on homeopathy.

You cannot randomly take homeopathic medicines, as they will only work, when carefully selected, for something that needs curing.

(source)

If a medicine has an active ingredient then there will be an effect, whether you are ill or not. That effect may not be the desired one, but there will be an effect. So, just remind me again why no one can overdose on homeopathic medicine?

Of course homeopaths know that one dose of however many pills taken together in one go, is the equivalent of only one dose, because each dose is a stimulus and it is the time frame that counts.

(source)

Oh, of course. The quantity of the supposedly active ingredient doesn’t matter. One dose of homeopathy is one dose when taken as instructed until someone takes large quantities and then they’re still taking only one dose. What is a dose of homeopathy is elastic, depending on how much you are actually taking.

Presumably then, homeopaths only put a teeny-weeny amount of the active ingredient in their medicine not because only a specific amount is needed or too much will be harmful, but to keep costs down.

But if the dose of homeopathy is a stimulus, it kick starts the body into healing itself, then surely a larger quantity of the bollox-in-a-bottle will stimulate more. Once again, this resulting stimulation may have an adverse effect and make someone iller rather than better, but it would have a effect. Wouldn’t you have thought?

According to it’s practitioners homeopathy is has no side effects. It doesn’t matter how much you take you can’t overdose. It is non-addictive, works fast in acute conditions, slow in chronic ones. Safe for everyone including animals and is cheap (apparently). It has, miraculously, no downsides at all.

It all sounds too good to be true, doesn’t it? And we know what they say about things that are too good to be true, don’t we.

Via Le Canard Noir
(all links to the Homeopathy Heals site are rel=”nofollow”)

I got a new post up at Mailwatch. Some cunt thinks smoking is good and that smokers do the NHS a favour by dropping down dead prematurely, which obviously all smokers do, except the ones that die a protracted painful death over many years of course.

I didn’t even go into the nightmare that was the comments underneath it.

The brain. That big lump of goo that controls everything about us, that lump of cells that give us our thoughts, that makes sense of the world aruond us, that does things that we have no control over in ways that we don’t know about. It makes us who, and what, we are. Without it we are nothing.

So who’s clever bloody idea was it to put it where it is?

It sits right on top of our bodies, exposed to what ever falls out the sky onto it and ready to be smacked against the ground whenever we take a tumble. It is attached to the main part of us by the flimsiest of connections, the neck, which really doesn’t take a lot to crack or break resulting in the disconnection between the control room of the body and the rest of the machinery rendering us to various degrees of helplessness.

It is packaged inside a hard case that has no softening on the inside. Even when the case is left undamaged by a blow, the brain inside can still be damaged by being bounced against the sides of its’ abode.

It really is a ridiculous arrangement for such an important organ. Intelligent design? If it was, it was a Friday afternoon job.